David Feldman is Impotent David Feldman: comedian, writer, raconteur and prizefighter.

April, 2005

THE FACTS: SEX WITH DAVID FELDMAN HURTS REPUBLICANS

Sat, 04/30/2005 - 9:10pm
Submitted by David

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GOVERNMENT RELEASES QUARTERLY<BR> REPORT ON FELDMAN SEX LIFE

Sat, 04/30/2005 - 8:37pm
Submitted by David

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EVERYBODY DANCE!

Sat, 04/30/2005 - 1:37pm
Submitted by David

HIT THE PLAY BUTTON BELOW


Sat, 04/30/2005 - 11:18am
Submitted by David


Sat, 04/30/2005 - 4:26am
Submitted by David



WE ARE SPONSORED BY...

Fri, 04/29/2005 - 1:29pm
Submitted by David

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Fri, 04/29/2005 - 3:12am
Submitted by David


KARL ROVE NAMED<BR>WHITE HOUSE<BR>PORN CZAR

Thu, 04/28/2005 - 4:26pm
Submitted by David

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TODAY'S DAILY MEDITATION

Thu, 04/28/2005 - 3:53am
Submitted by David

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SENIORS PROTEST REPUBLICAN <BR> SOCIAL SECURITY PLAN

Thu, 04/28/2005 - 3:19am
Submitted by David

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arg-grandpa-cr-32c.gifanimated gif via www.artie.com
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SAUDI PRINCE PROMISES TO OPEN<BR> HIS SPIGOT AND START PUMPING

Wed, 04/27/2005 - 2:11am
Submitted by David

FROM DEEP WITHIN SAUDI ARABIA'S
BOWELS DIRECTLY INTO YOURS...

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EXCLUSIVE: SIMON COWELL DATING <BR>BULIMIC ANN COULTER

Tue, 04/26/2005 - 1:03pm
Submitted by David

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Cowell caught here helping Bulimic Ann Coulter return a Tic Tac she accidentally swallowed.

THIS IS HOW MY WIFE SAW MY <BR>MOTHER AT LAST NIGHT'S SEDER:

Mon, 04/25/2005 - 9:35pm
Submitted by David

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(a.p. via yahoo)
TIME: Late last night.
PLACE: My home after the Seder.

MY WIFE: Can I give you a care package to take home?
MY MOTHER: I don't think so.
MY WIFE: Anything?
MY MOTHER: I...don't think so.
MY WIFE: But you hardly ate.
MY MOTHER: The important thing is you tried darling. Maybe next year you'll get it right.
DAVID: Ma, I'll walk you to the car.
MY MOTHER: Oh, is that David? I didn't see you all night, I didn't know you were here.
DAVID: We had guests. I was entertaining.
MY MOTHER: I'm not a guest?
DAVID: You're family.
MY MOTHER: Next time treat me like a guest.
MY WIFE: Nice seeing you again, Ma.
MY MOTHER: Uh....huh.

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And no Feldman Seder is ever complete without the male relative who married out of the religion but still insists on bringing his wife and kids anyway:

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JOHN BOLTON'S CAT

Mon, 04/25/2005 - 3:31am
Submitted by David

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(AP via Yahoo)
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WENDY'S MISSING FINGER LADY NOW<BR> PLANS TO SUE LAS VEGAS OLIVE GARDEN

Sat, 04/23/2005 - 2:51pm
Submitted by David

FOUND AN EYE IN HER SPAGHETTI AND MEATBALLS
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NEW POPE WAS MEMBER OF HITLER YOUTH<BR>ENGLAND'S PRINCE HARRY CONVERTS

Sat, 04/23/2005 - 2:28pm
Submitted by David

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Hitler Youth was the Nazi version of the Boy Scouts. But their camping trips were slightly different.

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LAY DOWN WITH DOGS...

Sat, 04/23/2005 - 4:29am
Submitted by David

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THE WEEK IN IMPOTENCE:

Sat, 04/23/2005 - 3:43am
Submitted by David

BRITNEY'S SECOND TRIMESTER...

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ENGLAND AND CHARLES STILL HAVE NOT GOTTEN USED TO CAMILLA'S TWO DOGS CHI CHI AND CHA CHA...
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TOM DELAY VISITS THE N.R.A....
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DR. BILL FRIST VISITS HIS DOMINATRIX...
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BULIMIC ANN COULTER MAKES THE COVER OF TIME...
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MORE ON BULIMIC ANN COULTER...
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OH, DID I MENTION ANN COULTER'S BULIMIC?
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LAST YEAR'S PASSOVER WITH THE FELDMANS

Fri, 04/22/2005 - 8:46pm
Submitted by David

My Uncle Gary and Aunt Barbara are Orthodox:

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WOMAN WHO FOUND FINGER<BR> IN WENDY'S CHILI ARRESTED:<BR> BULIMIC ANN COULTER CLAIMS,<BR>"SHE STOLE MY BULIMIA FINGER!!!"

Fri, 04/22/2005 - 2:49pm
Submitted by David

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Anna Lasavio pictured here may have walked off with Bulimic Ann Coutler's bulimia finger.